• Jasmine’s Blog – I Want to Have a Family

    Date: 2014.10.08 | Category: Jasmine's Blog | Tags:













    “I Want to Have a Family

    I once made a wish saying “there’s only one thing I want, I just want
    a family, I really really only want to have a family.” Then I made
    another wish, sadly saying “I really really just want one wish, to
    have a family of my own. Just to have people who care about me, people
    who love me, people who like me.”
    I knew I couldn’t go to the restroom by myself. I also knew I couldn’t
    get into bed and go to sleep by myself. I knew there were many things
    I could not do. I didn’t like it when people hit me or yell at me, I
    felt so very sad when people were yelling at me and scolding me. Some
    people said that I was useless since I couldn’t walk. Hearing someone
    say that made me so sad.
    Sometimes I was really happy when I saw other kids being adopted, I
    was truly happy for them. Sometimes, I would be very very sad thinking
    that I would likely never be adopted. I would feel very very bad.
    But sometimes I would think, it’s a very good thing that there are
    kindhearted people who adopt orphans!
    I was really scared that I would not have a chance anymore once I was
    14 years old. I was afraid that when someone wanted to adopt me it
    would already be too late.
    I didn’t know someone would adopt me, this I really didn’t know?
    Actually sometimes I would wet the bed. Whenever I wet the bed I would
    get hit, I was so scared of being hit.  (I will say more about this at the end. – Jasmine’s mom)
    I didn’t know if there would be anyone who wanted me.
    I also hoped lots of kids would be adopted and would not have to keep
    suffering here. Some kids were so afraid, many kids wanted to be
    adopted. Sometimes I would say, “this is not my home, I want to have a
    family of my own.” I didn’t like being an orphan, I just wanted to
    have a baba and mama who would love me and care about me!”

    (Jasmine’s mom’s words)

    At the beginning of her stay in the orphanage, when she was eight years old, Jasmine said the doctors said she should be able to walk.  When she wasn’t able to get out of her wheelchair, the orphanage would leave her food just out of reach thinking she would give up her little charade and walk to the food.  She says she fell out of her chair many times trying to get the food and they would just let her lie there with the same thought in mind – she would have to quit pretending and get up sooner or later.

    They gave her very little to drink throughout the day so she would only use the restroom in the morning and at night.  When there were occasions that the orphanage couldn’t get to her right away, she would wet herself.  This was very embarrassing to her.  As her punishment, the orphanage workers would allow the other children to hit and kick her.  Jasmine said this made her very sad and she began to believe that she was indeed worthless.

    She says she went to school for a year but then they moved the school to a different floor and she was no longer able to go because she couldn’t climb the stairs and there was no elevator.  She says she dreamed of being able to go to school.  She was left in her chair in front of the t.v. for years with nothing to do but dream of having a family.  Six long years of dreaming…

    And then she received a letter written by her daddy telling her how much he loved her and how beautiful he thought she was.  Jasmine says  this was the first glimpse she had that someone could love her.  Dan prayed over and over again for God to let Jasmine know that we loved her and to give her peace while she waited.

    Somehow Jasmine held on to her sweet, loving personality through everything she went through.  We are blessed to be her forever family.