• 30 Years

    Date: 2017.04.30 | Category: Kyle | Tags:

    30 years have come and gone and I still miss your face.

    I miss what could have been.

    I miss all those days when I could have held you near.

    I miss the dream that is still so vivid of you and Codey playing on a hill somewhere.  The grass is green.  The sun is shining.  I can feel the warmth on my face.  I see you both in little bib overalls and bright colored shirts.  I see you toddling and falling.  I see you running to your daddy.  I hear our laughter and I feel the love.

    It was the most beautiful dream.

    But the reality is that your daddy carried your 3 pound 8 ounce body, in a little white box, to the place your body would lie.

    FOREVER!

    Thank God that isn’t forever for you.  Thank God for the blessed hope of forever!  Thank God for the beautiful dream of seeing you again.

    Because you aren’t in that little white box.

    I know that.

    I know you are happy!

    I know for you it will be but a blip in the time of eternity.

    I know your death allowed me to not fear death and to realize the shortest of lives can have the most amazing amount of worth.

    I know all of this but I still miss you.

    I still wish I could celebrate your birthday!

    I still wish I could kiss your face!

    And even though I know that your death took us on the most amazing journey…

    The truth is…

    Five days wasn’t near enough.

    I still miss you.

    I wish you were here.

    I know that is selfish, but it is the truth!

    One day closer to seeing your sweet face and holding you again.

    Happy birthday Kyle!

    Your brother misses you and so do daddy and I.