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Trust
A few weeks ago we were presented with a little girl that had many, many health issues. The physical disabilities I could handle. The many hospital admissions, I couldn’t. We always stay with our kids while they are in the hospital. I just couldn’t do that with our two new little ones. Dan and I prayed and prayed about her and knew that she needed a home where she could have a lot of one on one care. A home that was quiet and our house was way too busy to meet her needs. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do, to turn down a child. Dan told me that we just had to trust that God had her family out there. With Benjamin and Maisey, I knew right from the start that I was supposed to be their mama. I didn’t feel that with this little girl. It is still hard because any family has to be better than no family. I decided to trust in the Lord’s plan and turn it over to Him. Tonight we learned that the little girl has found her forever family. I cried tears of joy. I’m just so happy and God is so good!
I must admit that I decided to go along with it and if she didn’t find a family and cycled through the agency again, then I would see what I could do. Why I do this I don’t know. Why I drag my feet after He has showed me time and time again His plan is always right, is anyone’s guess. I am turning it over faster and faster so I am making progress, but boy is it hard to say, “I don’t think I can do this!” I don’t like to admit that I couldn’t give this baby the time she deserved. I want to be able to do it all. It is very humbling to have to say “No” when you know what has been presented to you is not from God. It’s hard to just sit back, do nothing, and trust. As always God is good and He knew who her family should be. I am so, so happy. I love that there are so many families who will take these very sick kids and give them a chance to be loved. Everyone deserves to be loved. I will continue to pray for this family. They have a long road ahead of them, but her life is about to get a whole lot better. Praise God for that.